Seeking answers about life

I question myself everyday

While acting out the mundane,

Travelling to work everyday

Same trip, same train,

Can I break this cycle

Can I break this chain,

Sometimes I get hopeful

Through the thoughts I create

But then the self doubts creeps in

I think I am deluding myself,

That this is how life is

And there is nothing else.

Don’t look for more

For this is all there is,

I should lower my expectations

Be happy that I simply exist.

Yet I feel I was created to achieve more

I feel that there is more in store,

I feel like there is something behind a door

But I cannot find the key to unlock it,

I cannot seem to find what’s inside

And it torments my heart, soul and mind

And I end up asking am I wasting my time.

I just don’t know

So I just keep persevering with it,

Hoping something will change

But maybe that’s the crux of it

Hoping and waiting for something to happen,

Maybe that’s what wrong, I got to make it happen,

I got to do more to effect change,

I have to more in different ways.

I just don’t know,

I just can’t tell,

Sometimes I feel like screaming

Sometimes I want to yell,

Why can’t the answers come easier

I am searching within myself

But I am finding hard to discover just what else,

That I can do

To change things up,

To break the chains,

To achieve a change,

In my life that I need 

And that I seek,

Or should I simply accept this life

That I currently live,

It’s hard and it’s a struggle

But there are millions worse off than me,

I just wish I could find the answers, 

To these questions that I seek.

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8 thoughts on “Seeking answers about life

  1. I go through a very similar dance of thoughts. I think it shows there is a deeper duality and dichotomy between the human and spiritual part of us. In our spirit we know there is far more we could do and be but in the earthly human side we are also made of dust and clay and sometimes get stuck there. Just some thoughts. I empathise. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

      1. You sound to me from all your posts a very deep feeling spiritual person who feels great sadness and anger sometime at the state of the world so its no wonder you have those feelings of how things could be better. Life is full of unconsciousness. Love Deborah

        Liked by 1 person

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