The mystery of Humpty Dumpty

The day was sunny all the Kings soldiers

And all the Kings men were training and working

It had been deigned necessary by the king that a wall was needed

To keep out trespasses from other nursery rhymes

After all his kingdom needed to protect its borders

And ensure he made it great again

From the threat of little Bo Peep, Jack and Jill as well others

However the King allowed Humpty Dumpty reside there

Because he was very rich and the king loved other rich people.

On this fateful sunny day though Humpty Dumpty decided to climb up on the wall

He wanted to see how the lesser peasant nursery rhyme people were doing

He saw they were unhappy with the wall

But Humpty could careless and mocked them from on high

As he did this he suddenly inexplicably tumbled backward

Humpty fell off the wall!

With a loud noise Humpty cracked

The ground shook,

All the Kings horses and men tried putting him back together again

But failed.

Who did this deed?

Who could be so callous and brutal?

Some conspiracy theorists said it was the king

Others said it was the other nursery rhyme people

Or was it merely a false flag?

Either way the king took the opportunity to use this tragedy

And invade, kill and oppress other nursery rhyme lands

Leaving them destitute and in a mess

Then offered them the chance to let him help rebuild at a cost

Using all his Kings horses and men,

What a kind king he was.

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